Well, folks, we got the news today, and it looks like in July of next year I'll be passing out the cigars, for sure. Nicodemous, aka Nic, is indeed going to be a papa July 17th, 2007. The results of Amber's bloodwork came back today confirming that she is indeed with child!
Such super news for us to be receiving, because, as I stated in my story of Nic's Great Adventure, this was his first breeding, so he is one fertile little dickens for sure! To say that I'm a proud owner at this point in time would indeed be an understatement.
Any further developments will be published right here for all to read as they become available.
Now the long waiting period begins....
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Sunday, August 27, 2006
Child Molester
The skin crawls,
The heart races.
Breath coming in short gasps
The desire to depart
Becoming a fever
That burns both eyes,
Tears escaping
Casting trails down her face.
The one upon whom she bestowed
So much trust,
The one she had uttered her committment to
Countless times,
Forever embellishing the emotional
Interludes
They shared so many times together.
Unbelievably her eyes scan
The news item lying in front of her.
Her mind travelling back
Remembering those precious memories
That have yet to fade
From her mind.
She can still feel his hands upon her,
She can see the warmth in his eyes.
She can still recall the tremors in her body
That he had created as they shared
Intimate moments.
Deception,
Unknowingly a victim
Yet not like the one she has just discovered
As her unbelieving eyes
Have yet to convince her
That what she has read is true.
The words she has read,
His picture she has seen
Like countless thousands have done
Repetitively today,
The thoughts of only the perpetrator
And not of the young victim.
A stifled cry, muffled yet audible
Escaping from her lips
As the reality of this tragedy
Lies naked in print before her.
Disbelief becoming confusion,
As confusion becomes anger
And the memory of those promises
Discovering the emptiness
Of her heart.
The bastard!
The heart races.
Breath coming in short gasps
The desire to depart
Becoming a fever
That burns both eyes,
Tears escaping
Casting trails down her face.
The one upon whom she bestowed
So much trust,
The one she had uttered her committment to
Countless times,
Forever embellishing the emotional
Interludes
They shared so many times together.
Unbelievably her eyes scan
The news item lying in front of her.
Her mind travelling back
Remembering those precious memories
That have yet to fade
From her mind.
She can still feel his hands upon her,
She can see the warmth in his eyes.
She can still recall the tremors in her body
That he had created as they shared
Intimate moments.
Deception,
Unknowingly a victim
Yet not like the one she has just discovered
As her unbelieving eyes
Have yet to convince her
That what she has read is true.
The words she has read,
His picture she has seen
Like countless thousands have done
Repetitively today,
The thoughts of only the perpetrator
And not of the young victim.
A stifled cry, muffled yet audible
Escaping from her lips
As the reality of this tragedy
Lies naked in print before her.
Disbelief becoming confusion,
As confusion becomes anger
And the memory of those promises
Discovering the emptiness
Of her heart.
The bastard!
Escape
Pulling inward,
Withdrawing from what is set before me.
Leaving reality behind me,
Travelling down a one way street into
Oblivion.
Sanctuary at last.
Withdrawing from what is set before me.
Leaving reality behind me,
Travelling down a one way street into
Oblivion.
Sanctuary at last.
Saturday, August 12, 2006
Nic's Great Adventure
As most of you know, if you've done any reading here, you know that almost two years ago my wife and I went into a joint venture with my sister and her husband and started an alpaca farm. It's been a learning experience for us all, and the alpacas are wonderful animals to be around and fill a lot of hours with pleasure taking care of them.
Recently, our second to the youngest male(my wife and I own three males) was allowed his first sexual encounter. It was an amazing thing to witness, and believe it or not, if you know nothing about alpacas, the mating ritual is actually quite a romantic encounter. It's actually amazing to watch the male and female get together for the first time, because he actually kisses her on the head, and if she so inclines to be a part of this ritual with the male, she not only kisses him back on the head, she actually lies down for him to mount her.
We then go into the actual mating itself, which is a very lengthy process, and not uncommon to go as long as 45 minutes. (Kingfish, eat your heart out!) The male has this noise he makes during the entire process, and I may possibly have the spelling wrong, but it's called orgling. And it's not quiet, either.
Anyway, Nic was not only done in a much shorter period of time, but at first, we thought maybe he might be Greek...but he finally got things done correctly, and for days afterward, he walked around with his head held high, thinking himself quite the macho man.
Five days later, we brought him and his lover back together again, and once again, you could see the excitement building in the little dickens as we brought him and Amber back together again. This time, however, she promptly turned and spit right in his face. This is taken as a sign that the female is pregnant. If indeed this is the case, then Nic has much to be proud of, since this was his very first mating. And if indeed Amber did get pregnant during this first encounter, this means we have a very fertile male and we can begin studding him out in the very near future. This is our hope, this is our dream, and this is a part of our retirement investment in the years to come.
Late last week, just to check again, my sister once again led Nic over to Amber's side of the barn and this time, she spit all over him, time after time, so we're feeling very good now that the mating has indeed been a success, although I don't think Nic was none too pleased.
The attached picture is of Nic, in the middle, with his proud owner on the right(that would be me), and our youngest male, Trevor on the left. Nic is hard to see in this picture, but I can assure you, if alpacas can smile, Nic is surely doing so in this picture.
Friday, August 11, 2006
Remembering Summer Heat, Part Six
That concert at Greensburg High will always remain in my heart as probably the very best show we ever collectively put on as a band. Yes, other shows were maybe better musically, some of the band had better nights than other members, but collectively, the first Greensburg show was no doubt our best one ever!
That show also was a catalyst of sorts that led to other out of town shows as well.
We were asked to play at a nightclub in Carthage one night. It was a Friday night show, and even though not a single member of the band was 21, we got the go ahead to perform there one Friday night. It was going to be damned good money, too. Since the crowd in attendance would be consuming alcohol, I guess the owners of the nightclub decided we could be paid a handsome sum of money for our night's work.
I don't remember the name of the club now, as the years have taken a toll on certain things I remember. I do know, however, that the place we were playing had at one time been a bowling alley. We knew we would have a large area for people to dance, and people would be eating and drinking as well, so we were really fired up at playing at an adult oriented nightclub, regardless of the fact that we had heard the place did tend to get a bit rowdy at times.
We met at Mike's Dad's law office and proceded to load Denny's Dad's van with all our equipment, which I assure you was not a quick task to do, because we did have a lot of equipment. Part of it always had to go in a couple of our cars, to boot, and we always managed to get everything loaded in a relatively reasonable amount of time.
This particular evening, we used my car as well, which didn't happen a lot, but what the hey? I felt like I was one of the band(which I've since been told by Mike that I indeed was a part of the band) so I didn't mind loading a bit of equipment in the trunk and hauling a couple of the guys in the band with me. We also took along a friend, maybe two, but one for sure that I remember. A friend of mine, Bill, who also played fairly good drums, came along with us as well. Later on, Bill's attendance with us that night would lead to bigger things for him. But that's a story for later on.
Anyway, loaded down with equipment, a couple of guys from the band, and Bill, we began motoring from Rushville to Carthage for what we were expecting to be a great night of music and fun.
We couldn't have been more wrong.
We arrived about an hour before we were to take to the stage and walked in to check the place out since we had never been there before. Upon our arrival, we got out of our respective vehicles and walked in the side entrance door to the nightclub.
Coming in from out of the bright sun to a dimly lit room with no windows took a moment to get used to. But as our eyes adjusted, we were pleased with what we saw. The stage ahead of us was carpeted and surrounded by a wooden railing with an opening off to each side to enable us to carry our equipment up and thru for setting up. The ceiling, however, was quite low, and though none of us was tall enough to ram our heads into it, it was going to have to be of some concern while the band moved around on the stage, and certain movements with the microphone and guitars was going to be limited.
There were several tables off to each side of the stage and up against the walls, leaving a vast area in front of the stage for dancing. A hallway led the way up to the front of the building, obviously to the entrance and the kitchen and bar area, and probably where a lot of the patrons would enter and pay their cover charge to get in.
A small service window was in one of the walls, apparently where one could go and order drinks once the dancing got started. We saw a couple of fellows sitting at a table, having a couple of beers, but they seemed not the least bit interested in a group of guys checking out the stage. They seemed more determined to concentrate on their drinking. We all looked at each other amongst ourselves and started asking each other what this night might hold in store for us since the crowd would be drinking alcohol while listening to us, watching us and dancing to our music and our show.
I looked around, found the electrical receptacles both on the wall and recessed into the stage floor and I began figuring out where each one of our pieces of equipment needed to be plugged in as well as where my lighting console was going to be located. We each walked around the stage and pretty much came to a mutual agreement as to where each item was to be placed. It was much easier to decide then than after we started bringing all that equipment in and then try figuring it out.
After about five minutes of discussion on the matter, Bill, Mike, Jay, Bill, Jim and myself started out to get the equipment and Denny decided to go find the manager and let him know that the entertainment for the evening had arrived.
We had probably moved in two amps and the beginning of Jim's drumset when Denny reappeared, and the look on his face wasn't a happy one. It was more of a look of shock and disbelief than anything, to be honest with you.
Jay was the first to approach him after we put our first bit of equipment on the stage. "Everything okay, man?" he asked Denny. "You don't look too happy, dude."
Denny shook his head. "No, guys, we got a hell of a problem here. The man up front says we aren't scheduled to play here tonight, that we're supposed to be here next month instead of tonight."
I would love to have been able to have see the shocked look on all our faces, especially mine, because this was a dance we had been anticipating for a couple of months since we were booked to do the show. I saw the look on Jay's and Mike's face. I didn't look at Bill, probably because I didn't think it would matter to someone who wasn't in the band, but I did look at Denny's, and we were all no doubt wearing that same shocked expression, and one that was also filled with disappointment and disbelief.
I looked at Denny, who had handled the booking, and I asked him, "Man, are you sure it was tonight we were supposed to be here?"
Denny replied,"Hell yeah, man. I've got the date circled on the calendar at home in red, and I wrote it down on the message pad right next to the phone the night this dude called us and asked us to be here. He said they have a country-western band coming in tonight, and they're getting paid union scale."
That statement signalled to me the truth of our situation. The nightclub had booked a dues paying band and they had set the date, probably the only one they had open for awhile, and this band probably catered more to the redneck crowd that would probably be here tonight. I was quite sure they would be much more accustomed to listening to Merle Haggard and Charley Pride than they would be Steppenwolf and Cream.
Me, being the ever-present rebel at times like this said,"Well, hell, they can't take the stage if they have five guys sitting in the middle of it, can they?"
Jay started smiling that sly Jay smile that I've missed so much over the years since his untimely passing a few years ago, and he asked, "You mean, just plop our asses down on the stage and refuse to move, Charlie?"
I smiled back and shook my head in an affirmative motion.
"Far out, man, and you're right, they can't do shit as long we're sitting in the way. Besides, we're all underage and if anyone touches us, they go to jail, right Mike?" I think because Mike's dad was an accomplished attorney we all considered Mike our legal adviser.
"Yeah, legally they can't touch us, man. If they do, we can have all their asses hauled of to jail by signing a warrant against them," was his reply.
So, we moved our equipment back out to the vehicles, walked back inside the club, and promptly planted our asses down in the middle of the stage. I pulled a cigarette out of my shirt pocket, lit it up, and passed one over to Jim and one to Jay. And that was how our protest began that night. A sitdown strike in an over 21 nightclub, daring anyone to interfere with us.
A few minutes passed, a few more patrons made their way in and sat down, the waitress taking their orders, and soon the alcohol was beginning to flow amongst the patrons. We all thought we were truly going to make a statement and somehow get our way by sitting down in the middle of the stage and refusing to move.
I seemed to have forgotten the one obvious thing about this protest of mine.
We were sitting in the middle of the stage, attempting to stop the evening's entertainment from setting up on the stage in a nightclub where the sign on the door clearly stated: NO ONE UNDER THE AGE OF 21 WILL BE PERMITTED TO ENTER UNDER PENALTY OF THE LAW.
We were all under the age of 21.
Gigantic whoops, here, folks!
About a half hour into our sitdown strike the manager walked in and stared at us, the look on his face clearly stating that he didn't know why we were still here, and the sneer that followed that look clearing stating without words that he was highly and profusely pissed right at this moment. He grabbed the waitress by the arm as she started past him and I could tell she was basically telling him from her body language that she had no clue as to why were still there, and even more why we were sitting in the middle of the stage where his union scale band was going to be playing in less than half an hour.
His hand pointed to us, pointed to the door and his right fist hit his right hand and made quite an audible sound, even over the blaring of the jukebox.
I believe had I been a lesser young man at the time that my bladder would have probably emptied itself right at the precise moment his fist hit his hand.
He turned back towards the front and stormed off, and this halfway attractive waitress came over to us, a bewildered and embarrassed look on her face. I could tell she didn't want to do the deed she was about to do.
She walked over to us, looking at each one of us as she spoke, and she spoke nicely, a bit ashamed, but also delivered the message her boss had given her to deliver. "Guys, I have nothing in this, so please don't be upset with me, ok? My boss told me he's not sure what it is you're up to, but I know what's going on, because he hired another band in here tonight instead of you because he told me he did. But if you don't get out of here now, and I do mean now, he's going to call the sheriff's department and have you all arrested for being in here, and he can do it because you're all under twenty-one. He told me to tell you to come back in four weeks and the whole place will be yours for the evening, with an extra fifty dollars over what he said he'd pay you to begin with. He doesn't know I told you about that you really supposed to be the band here tonight, and if he finds out I did, I'll get fired, or worse. Just pick up your stuff and go, and we'll see you here next month, ok guys?"
She didn't wait for an answer, she just took her drink tray on back towards the kitchen area, and with that, we all looked at each other and decided getting our asses thrown in jail was not worth what we were trying to pull, so we each stood up and grabbed what we had brought in with us, and made post-haste to the door and out to our vehicles. It didn't take too long to get them started and heading back towards Rushville, either.
We ended up going back to Mike's house and sat with his family in the family room and I got to listen to Savoy Brown that night for the very first time in my life, their album Blue Matter, and we talked to Mike's folks and sister about our experience that evening.
Mike's dad, Jack, looked at us and asked, "So, are you boys going back up there and play next month."
Without a moment's hesitation, and damned near in unison, we replied, "Hell, NO!"
That response got Jack's family laughing, and finally, after a few seconds, it got the rest of us laughing, too.
to be continued.....
That show also was a catalyst of sorts that led to other out of town shows as well.
We were asked to play at a nightclub in Carthage one night. It was a Friday night show, and even though not a single member of the band was 21, we got the go ahead to perform there one Friday night. It was going to be damned good money, too. Since the crowd in attendance would be consuming alcohol, I guess the owners of the nightclub decided we could be paid a handsome sum of money for our night's work.
I don't remember the name of the club now, as the years have taken a toll on certain things I remember. I do know, however, that the place we were playing had at one time been a bowling alley. We knew we would have a large area for people to dance, and people would be eating and drinking as well, so we were really fired up at playing at an adult oriented nightclub, regardless of the fact that we had heard the place did tend to get a bit rowdy at times.
We met at Mike's Dad's law office and proceded to load Denny's Dad's van with all our equipment, which I assure you was not a quick task to do, because we did have a lot of equipment. Part of it always had to go in a couple of our cars, to boot, and we always managed to get everything loaded in a relatively reasonable amount of time.
This particular evening, we used my car as well, which didn't happen a lot, but what the hey? I felt like I was one of the band(which I've since been told by Mike that I indeed was a part of the band) so I didn't mind loading a bit of equipment in the trunk and hauling a couple of the guys in the band with me. We also took along a friend, maybe two, but one for sure that I remember. A friend of mine, Bill, who also played fairly good drums, came along with us as well. Later on, Bill's attendance with us that night would lead to bigger things for him. But that's a story for later on.
Anyway, loaded down with equipment, a couple of guys from the band, and Bill, we began motoring from Rushville to Carthage for what we were expecting to be a great night of music and fun.
We couldn't have been more wrong.
We arrived about an hour before we were to take to the stage and walked in to check the place out since we had never been there before. Upon our arrival, we got out of our respective vehicles and walked in the side entrance door to the nightclub.
Coming in from out of the bright sun to a dimly lit room with no windows took a moment to get used to. But as our eyes adjusted, we were pleased with what we saw. The stage ahead of us was carpeted and surrounded by a wooden railing with an opening off to each side to enable us to carry our equipment up and thru for setting up. The ceiling, however, was quite low, and though none of us was tall enough to ram our heads into it, it was going to have to be of some concern while the band moved around on the stage, and certain movements with the microphone and guitars was going to be limited.
There were several tables off to each side of the stage and up against the walls, leaving a vast area in front of the stage for dancing. A hallway led the way up to the front of the building, obviously to the entrance and the kitchen and bar area, and probably where a lot of the patrons would enter and pay their cover charge to get in.
A small service window was in one of the walls, apparently where one could go and order drinks once the dancing got started. We saw a couple of fellows sitting at a table, having a couple of beers, but they seemed not the least bit interested in a group of guys checking out the stage. They seemed more determined to concentrate on their drinking. We all looked at each other amongst ourselves and started asking each other what this night might hold in store for us since the crowd would be drinking alcohol while listening to us, watching us and dancing to our music and our show.
I looked around, found the electrical receptacles both on the wall and recessed into the stage floor and I began figuring out where each one of our pieces of equipment needed to be plugged in as well as where my lighting console was going to be located. We each walked around the stage and pretty much came to a mutual agreement as to where each item was to be placed. It was much easier to decide then than after we started bringing all that equipment in and then try figuring it out.
After about five minutes of discussion on the matter, Bill, Mike, Jay, Bill, Jim and myself started out to get the equipment and Denny decided to go find the manager and let him know that the entertainment for the evening had arrived.
We had probably moved in two amps and the beginning of Jim's drumset when Denny reappeared, and the look on his face wasn't a happy one. It was more of a look of shock and disbelief than anything, to be honest with you.
Jay was the first to approach him after we put our first bit of equipment on the stage. "Everything okay, man?" he asked Denny. "You don't look too happy, dude."
Denny shook his head. "No, guys, we got a hell of a problem here. The man up front says we aren't scheduled to play here tonight, that we're supposed to be here next month instead of tonight."
I would love to have been able to have see the shocked look on all our faces, especially mine, because this was a dance we had been anticipating for a couple of months since we were booked to do the show. I saw the look on Jay's and Mike's face. I didn't look at Bill, probably because I didn't think it would matter to someone who wasn't in the band, but I did look at Denny's, and we were all no doubt wearing that same shocked expression, and one that was also filled with disappointment and disbelief.
I looked at Denny, who had handled the booking, and I asked him, "Man, are you sure it was tonight we were supposed to be here?"
Denny replied,"Hell yeah, man. I've got the date circled on the calendar at home in red, and I wrote it down on the message pad right next to the phone the night this dude called us and asked us to be here. He said they have a country-western band coming in tonight, and they're getting paid union scale."
That statement signalled to me the truth of our situation. The nightclub had booked a dues paying band and they had set the date, probably the only one they had open for awhile, and this band probably catered more to the redneck crowd that would probably be here tonight. I was quite sure they would be much more accustomed to listening to Merle Haggard and Charley Pride than they would be Steppenwolf and Cream.
Me, being the ever-present rebel at times like this said,"Well, hell, they can't take the stage if they have five guys sitting in the middle of it, can they?"
Jay started smiling that sly Jay smile that I've missed so much over the years since his untimely passing a few years ago, and he asked, "You mean, just plop our asses down on the stage and refuse to move, Charlie?"
I smiled back and shook my head in an affirmative motion.
"Far out, man, and you're right, they can't do shit as long we're sitting in the way. Besides, we're all underage and if anyone touches us, they go to jail, right Mike?" I think because Mike's dad was an accomplished attorney we all considered Mike our legal adviser.
"Yeah, legally they can't touch us, man. If they do, we can have all their asses hauled of to jail by signing a warrant against them," was his reply.
So, we moved our equipment back out to the vehicles, walked back inside the club, and promptly planted our asses down in the middle of the stage. I pulled a cigarette out of my shirt pocket, lit it up, and passed one over to Jim and one to Jay. And that was how our protest began that night. A sitdown strike in an over 21 nightclub, daring anyone to interfere with us.
A few minutes passed, a few more patrons made their way in and sat down, the waitress taking their orders, and soon the alcohol was beginning to flow amongst the patrons. We all thought we were truly going to make a statement and somehow get our way by sitting down in the middle of the stage and refusing to move.
I seemed to have forgotten the one obvious thing about this protest of mine.
We were sitting in the middle of the stage, attempting to stop the evening's entertainment from setting up on the stage in a nightclub where the sign on the door clearly stated: NO ONE UNDER THE AGE OF 21 WILL BE PERMITTED TO ENTER UNDER PENALTY OF THE LAW.
We were all under the age of 21.
Gigantic whoops, here, folks!
About a half hour into our sitdown strike the manager walked in and stared at us, the look on his face clearly stating that he didn't know why we were still here, and the sneer that followed that look clearing stating without words that he was highly and profusely pissed right at this moment. He grabbed the waitress by the arm as she started past him and I could tell she was basically telling him from her body language that she had no clue as to why were still there, and even more why we were sitting in the middle of the stage where his union scale band was going to be playing in less than half an hour.
His hand pointed to us, pointed to the door and his right fist hit his right hand and made quite an audible sound, even over the blaring of the jukebox.
I believe had I been a lesser young man at the time that my bladder would have probably emptied itself right at the precise moment his fist hit his hand.
He turned back towards the front and stormed off, and this halfway attractive waitress came over to us, a bewildered and embarrassed look on her face. I could tell she didn't want to do the deed she was about to do.
She walked over to us, looking at each one of us as she spoke, and she spoke nicely, a bit ashamed, but also delivered the message her boss had given her to deliver. "Guys, I have nothing in this, so please don't be upset with me, ok? My boss told me he's not sure what it is you're up to, but I know what's going on, because he hired another band in here tonight instead of you because he told me he did. But if you don't get out of here now, and I do mean now, he's going to call the sheriff's department and have you all arrested for being in here, and he can do it because you're all under twenty-one. He told me to tell you to come back in four weeks and the whole place will be yours for the evening, with an extra fifty dollars over what he said he'd pay you to begin with. He doesn't know I told you about that you really supposed to be the band here tonight, and if he finds out I did, I'll get fired, or worse. Just pick up your stuff and go, and we'll see you here next month, ok guys?"
She didn't wait for an answer, she just took her drink tray on back towards the kitchen area, and with that, we all looked at each other and decided getting our asses thrown in jail was not worth what we were trying to pull, so we each stood up and grabbed what we had brought in with us, and made post-haste to the door and out to our vehicles. It didn't take too long to get them started and heading back towards Rushville, either.
We ended up going back to Mike's house and sat with his family in the family room and I got to listen to Savoy Brown that night for the very first time in my life, their album Blue Matter, and we talked to Mike's folks and sister about our experience that evening.
Mike's dad, Jack, looked at us and asked, "So, are you boys going back up there and play next month."
Without a moment's hesitation, and damned near in unison, we replied, "Hell, NO!"
That response got Jack's family laughing, and finally, after a few seconds, it got the rest of us laughing, too.
to be continued.....
Sunday, August 06, 2006
Ann
Confusion abounds....
I'm never at a loss, normally, for what direction my life should take, but for the moment, I'm totally at a loss.
My wife's step mom died yesterday, and when she died she hated me and had held those feelings for over the past sixteen or so years, all due to a stupid misunderstanding.
The problem I'm having with this is that she hated me for reasons that were not a fault of my own...
I had told my wife on many occasions that someday this woman would leave this world hating me, and it would not be of my own doing.
I had no idea it would be this soon.
And even though it was a stupid misunderstanding, I can never get her to see my side of what happened...
And THAT is what is killing me tonight as I write this...
No, I wasn't wrong all those years ago....
But now, I'll never have the chance to make things better between us...
And that will never, ever, leave my mind....
I'm never at a loss, normally, for what direction my life should take, but for the moment, I'm totally at a loss.
My wife's step mom died yesterday, and when she died she hated me and had held those feelings for over the past sixteen or so years, all due to a stupid misunderstanding.
The problem I'm having with this is that she hated me for reasons that were not a fault of my own...
I had told my wife on many occasions that someday this woman would leave this world hating me, and it would not be of my own doing.
I had no idea it would be this soon.
And even though it was a stupid misunderstanding, I can never get her to see my side of what happened...
And THAT is what is killing me tonight as I write this...
No, I wasn't wrong all those years ago....
But now, I'll never have the chance to make things better between us...
And that will never, ever, leave my mind....
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Departation
Hatred was the fire in your blood
Anger was what kept you going.
Kind words never came from your mouth
In your world,
No one was ever right but you.
Many tried to get close to you
But the coldness of your heart
Kept so many locked out
That truly wanted to be accepted
Without any conditions
Demanded by you.
In an instant
All has changed
And the coldness and bitterness
That held you captive thoughout
Your years
Gained you nothing in the end
But the hurt you brought
Upon so many
Who only longed to gain favor
In your eyes.
And now
In a split second
All that has come to a bitter end
And you took nothing with you
From this life
But the heavy chip you carried on your shoulder.
I can only shake my head
And wonder
If any of that matters to you now
As you enter the next phase
Of your eternity?
Such a shame...
Anger was what kept you going.
Kind words never came from your mouth
In your world,
No one was ever right but you.
Many tried to get close to you
But the coldness of your heart
Kept so many locked out
That truly wanted to be accepted
Without any conditions
Demanded by you.
In an instant
All has changed
And the coldness and bitterness
That held you captive thoughout
Your years
Gained you nothing in the end
But the hurt you brought
Upon so many
Who only longed to gain favor
In your eyes.
And now
In a split second
All that has come to a bitter end
And you took nothing with you
From this life
But the heavy chip you carried on your shoulder.
I can only shake my head
And wonder
If any of that matters to you now
As you enter the next phase
Of your eternity?
Such a shame...
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
So Far, So Good
This vacation has gone pretty smoothly so far.
And while I haven't done anything remarkable, travelled any great distance or gone anywhere unforgettable, this vacation has served me well by allowing me to clear the dustbin of my brain and sweep out some of the cobwebs that have gathered there.
For three straight days I have ridden my new scooter a lot of miles and on a lot of different types of terrain. I've highway driven, county road driven, and even managed to traverse two thickly gravelled driveways. THOSE were a challenge.
I finished a book I had been reading, started another one, and generally enjoyed lying about leisurely in the afternoons because of this damnable summer heat. (Oh, yeah, that reminds me, I have another chapter of Remembering Summer Heat to try and get to this week as well.) The heat index has been well over a hundred, the heat and humidity have been pretty hellacious, so my riding and most outdoor activities have been done during the cooler morning hours.
We were able to breed our second to the youngest male alpaca this week, which was quite the experience for him, as well as for us. I would have never believed livestock breeding to be as romantic as this truly was. And now, just a few days after his first sexual encounter, young Nicodemous is quite the stud muffin, or so he thinks.
Now, as I begin the second half of my vacation(yeah, the first half flew by) my wife will now be joining me for the next five days. I've a surprise or two in store for her, just to keep things fun for her, and Friday evening, weather permitting, we're going to the local amphitheater to see the Irish band Gaelic Storm, who appeared in the movie "Titanic."
I've certainly not missed work, and while I'm not dreading going back, I can certainly say that I would much rather be away for another week, because I didn't get much done outside because of the heat, and I'm still behind on things that I hoped I would have gotten caught up this week.
Ah, well, there's always that two week vacation I have coming up in October, and that one is just a mere eight and a half weeks away.
So, come on October!
And while I haven't done anything remarkable, travelled any great distance or gone anywhere unforgettable, this vacation has served me well by allowing me to clear the dustbin of my brain and sweep out some of the cobwebs that have gathered there.
For three straight days I have ridden my new scooter a lot of miles and on a lot of different types of terrain. I've highway driven, county road driven, and even managed to traverse two thickly gravelled driveways. THOSE were a challenge.
I finished a book I had been reading, started another one, and generally enjoyed lying about leisurely in the afternoons because of this damnable summer heat. (Oh, yeah, that reminds me, I have another chapter of Remembering Summer Heat to try and get to this week as well.) The heat index has been well over a hundred, the heat and humidity have been pretty hellacious, so my riding and most outdoor activities have been done during the cooler morning hours.
We were able to breed our second to the youngest male alpaca this week, which was quite the experience for him, as well as for us. I would have never believed livestock breeding to be as romantic as this truly was. And now, just a few days after his first sexual encounter, young Nicodemous is quite the stud muffin, or so he thinks.
Now, as I begin the second half of my vacation(yeah, the first half flew by) my wife will now be joining me for the next five days. I've a surprise or two in store for her, just to keep things fun for her, and Friday evening, weather permitting, we're going to the local amphitheater to see the Irish band Gaelic Storm, who appeared in the movie "Titanic."
I've certainly not missed work, and while I'm not dreading going back, I can certainly say that I would much rather be away for another week, because I didn't get much done outside because of the heat, and I'm still behind on things that I hoped I would have gotten caught up this week.
Ah, well, there's always that two week vacation I have coming up in October, and that one is just a mere eight and a half weeks away.
So, come on October!
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