Enlightenment

Sometimes in our lives, things have a way of happening,
Of working in ways we don't seem to understand,
Yet eventually,
Reality comes to light
And total realization blazes forth.

The Proverbial

Just because the can was opened doesn't necessarily mean that there's worms inside of it.

Desolate

Surrounded by people
Yet feeling all alone
Forcing the smile on my face
No meaning behind it but as a shadow
Hiding, unable to explain why.

Words are such wicked weapons
Spoken without thinking
Rendering the pain of a stilleto
Piercing the heart.

You are oblivious to the hurt
You planted
With your words and your wicked smile,
But the damage you caused
Leaves me feeling abandoned
While still surrounded by an unsuspecting crowd.
I feel so
Alone.

Untitled

Unanswered questions,
Unextingushable fire of fear.
Not certain why I've been chosen,
Unsure what is lying inside me
Waiting to pounce.

I feel the change in me,
Inward and outward both,
Yet I'm unable to change the course
Of either.

Answers lie ahead
In mere days,
And although a fear resides in my heart,
I so desire to know the truth
And what path it shall lead me upon.

Fuming Confusion

Like an invading spirit,
Doubt,
like an invading cancer,
Ate thru the security and barrier
Of my psyche,
Creating a questioning,
Causing me to look backward,
Ignoring forward momentum,
Begetting indecision,
Allowing thoughts of inadequacy
To become a pendulum
Of searing and spiraling
Deeply embedded emotions.

How does one escape that which bears no
Reason to escape from?
Why does one continually feel the
Insecurity
That truly doesn't exist?
How can one finally move away
Trek forward
And break free from a self-created
Prison
That binds me, ties me down and holds me back?

Clarity arrives, yet only in small
Moments.
I wonder of the eventuality of
Truth,
That still shields itself from me.
I damn you, over and over
Not wanting to blame you, but myself,
Yet the reality of the situation
Is clear, yet I try to view it thru
A smoky haze.
I cease to see the honesty I hold onto.

The heart continues to harden,
The spirit of love continues to die
As the cancer spreads,
And eats away at my heart and my soul.

You've had your chance,
You hold no feelings for the ones who so much
Wanted nothing more than just to
Feel you in their hearts,
And know that you desired nothing
At all, but to be the demon
That you have been
All along.

But I'm seeing clearer,
I will rise above
This shitpile you yourself assembled,
And I will break free,
One day soon,
I will break free.

Sanctuary!

Hiatus Almost Over

After an absence of nearly five months(yeah, it's been a busy five months, faithful few!) I am about to embark on yet another round of postings, again with no set schedule, but I am indeed coming back very, very soon.

Becoming a civic volunteer has definitely changed a lot of things in my life, my timetable, my lifestyle and my writing as well. Yet, it's been such a rewarding and wonderful summer, more of which we shall discuss at a later time.

In the meantime, I hope I've been missed and I hope that this posting gets you wanting more and waiting and anticipating my next entry.

Hold on, we're about to take off once again on this ride together...

I can't wait.

How about you?