White Rose

He wanted so much to just let her know
How she had taken such a place in his heart
He needed a token to show her that love
Yet he hadn't figured out how to start.

His letters told her of the love that he had
And the depth of the love that he felt.
Yet he needed to show her in a small special way
How deep within his heart she now dwelt.

Through her words he discovered the things that she loved
And carefully he searched and he chose
To send her a gift that she held close to her heart
And that gift was a single white rose.

The day it arrived she knew in her heart
That the love that he felt was so true
That she let herself feel for the first time in years
Deepening love for the man she barely knew.

Though the promises they made to each other weren't kept
Their love for each other stayed strong
Across all the miles that divided the two
Their love was forever lifelong.

And years down the road as time fleeted by
And their separate lives went on by
The man who was older than the woman by ten years
Eventually lay down to die.

At the graveyard the day the man was laid to his rest
A gift was found lying on his coffin which shows
That an undying love is a true special thing,
On his coffin lay a single white rose.

Autumn 2011

This year as my favorite season enters the end of its first third, I am amazed at how different I view it as I don't have to return to work after a two week vacation like I normally do.

This year, I continue to have no schedule and am able to enjoy more of the autumn cooler temperatures and fall colors. This year I feel more alive than I normally do, and that's just the beginning, hopefully.

Bloodwork this past week revealed that my blood sugar is in the danger catergory, signaling that I could be possibly becoming diabetic. So, for the past several days I have carefully watched my sugar intake, cut back on calories and exercised. I prepare now for additional bloodwork this Tuesday morning. If the the blood sugar is down, things are good. If the blood sugar remains elevated, I've been warned oral insulin is a real possibility.

I remain hopeful that things will be much better for me when I get the results of my bloodwork this week. Hopefully my life can resume, with a new awareness about what I can allow myself to eat and drink regularly.

Time will tell.

Afterworld

A lead bullet
Three buckeyes
Nail clippers
Car keys
Red bandana handkerchief
Assorted change
Broken mirrored brush
Balls of lint
A leather wallet.
All that was left
Was in the dead man's pockets,.
His life picked clean
His identity
Anonymous
The love in his heart
Emptied
Along with his blood.
Glasses at his side
Body left abandoned
As the spirit
Whisked away
On the currents of the
Wind.

Handing Over The Reins

Another task that I undertook on September 30th was handing the reins and tasks of my job over to three of my co-workers, Larry, Jane and Brittney. The picture of us together is kind of heartwarming to me because it shows me with a great group of clerks who will be taking over for me, as I will probably be the last full time window clerk our office ever has.

I like the picture of me standing there alone, simply because it was indeed the LAST time I stood at the service counter. This was my work station full time since 1984, and I had stood there off and on since 1979 while I was part time.

I have made so many friends at this counter over all those decades and some of them have become very close and personal friends as well. My emotions on leaving have been tumultous, but I leave the job with my head held high, always striving to give the best of myself to each person that came into the office.

This job has been my life for over half my life and I leave it smiling, knowing I did the best I could do most days.

September 30th, October 1, 2011

Two recent, very emotional days for me, as I worked my last day at the Rushville Post Office and my co-workers celebrated with me as I received my retirement certificate and was presented with a very nice gift of a gift certificate to Amazon.com that my co-workers chipped in and got for me. Hard as I tried, I couldn't keep my emotions in check as I tried to make a short speech about my years at the post office.

In essence, the average span of days a human being spends on this earth number approximately 22,000. My career at the post office spanned a total of 11,954 days. Hard to imagine, but over half my life was spent in this position of employment. Clocking out that day brought on more emotions as I realized I had done my last work for United States Postal Service, over a span of years I am so proud to have served.

On the next night, over 80 people came to a surprise retirement party my wonderful sister and her husband threw for me. More gifts, cards and just general good fellowship greeted me this evening. I was more than blessed with this party and this turnout, I was truly humbled.

What more can I say about these two days?

Mere words are not enough.

I hope these four pictures, two from each day, speak for themselves.

George Burns - I Wish I Was Eighteen Again

There's so much truth in the lyrics to this song, not to mention a really good performance by George himself.

喜多郎 Kitaro - Koi from Best Of Kitaro DVD 2001

Be sure to turn off the jukebox on the right and listen to this wondrous music. Kitaro will be remembered centuries from now as a total musical genius.

Justice?

Guilty as charged
Tried without a jury
Found guilty
And sentenced
Without so much as
A word of defense.
Judgement decided,
Banished and branded
No questions
Guilty by interpretation
Of the judge.

Fair enough!

It's A New Dawn

The sun rose again this morning,
Casting shadows
But leaving no doubts behind
As the morning dew began its process
Of drying out,
A rooster crowed off in the distance
Signaling the start
Of a new day
A new dawn
And promises
Of less complications
Ahead.

Charlie Stout calls it a day

Charlie Stout calls it a day

One Final Day

I waited on my final customer today at the Rushville Post Office. Right at 4PM on the dot, a nice young lady handed me two letters, asked me two questions and then asked if this was my last day at work.

I told her it was my last day on the window and she would no doubt be my last customer, EVER!

And she was.

Now, tomorrow lies ahead, my final cash audit, turning in my keys, my government ID and then a little fellowship with my fellow workers.

I'm still in a bit of disbelief that it's all over in less than 24 hours from now.

I'm elated, morose, happy, sad, excited and worried.

All at the same time.

Somebody pinch me, I don't think this is really happening to me!~

The Gathered

the quiet night
awakened by the scream
of the unknown,
grew darker
to hide the secrets
that lay beyond sight
and gathered the gloom
to surround itself
as the journey into Oblivion
began.

The Angel Song -- SRC Milestones

This song was amazing at its time and still, all these years later, it still invokes amazing feelings in my heart as I listen to it. SRC was a band ahead of their time.

The Countdown Is On!

A new career starts for me in just 18 days.

I'm retiring from my career with the U S Postal Service that began way back in 1979.

On September 30th, 2011, that will all come to an end as I clock in and out at the Rushville Post Office for the very last time. I plan to write more on my 32 plus years at the Post Office at another time.

Today, I'm writing about my career change.

On October 1st I will begin my new career as a househusband. While to some that may sound funny, it's actually something I am looking forward to with great anticipation.

It will be a complete change of pace for me, and it will begin a phase of my life in which I start paying my wife of over 33 years back. For all the years we have been married, she has been chief cook and bottle washer. She's taken care of all the meals, all the cooking and cleaning, and the laundry.

On October 1st, I plan on taking as much of that off her as I can.

It will give me a chance to renew my culinary skills, which, frankly, I haven't used much for a long, long time. I'm looking forward to setting back to work creating meals and taking care of our home while Peggy continues to go work for a few more years.

I've got a lot to learn about managing my time here at home, and making sure things are done and done on a regular schedule. I'm looking forward to putting the meals on the table and taking as much of the household load off her as I can.

I also plan on working out regularly and committing to losing weight and getting myself into much better shape physically.

While they may sound dull to many, to me, it sounds like the greatest challenge I can undertake right now, and I can't wait for this new phase in my life to begin.

Eighteen days and counting.

Steppenwolf - Snowblind Friend

Hoyt Axton wrote two songs that Steppenwolf recorded. The Pusher was the first.

Snowblind Friend was the second.

This is a video Steppenwolf recorded in the studio when they recorded Snowblind Friend. Such amazing lyrics and a truly stellar and kozmic performance of this truly terrific song. Hope you enjoy it!

And as always, before you play it, don't forget to turn off the jukebox on the right side of the page, otherwise you'll be listening to two songs.

Faze Nine

An unknown face
Staring back at me
From this window where
I used to see myself
Staring back at me.
Clouds of darkness
Taking my memories,
Just out of my reach,
Not quite able to grasp
Or remember.
Vertigo, sweet, sweet
Vertigo
My constant companion now,
Staying with me
And never releasing her hold.
Who is this stranger
In the window,
And why is he staring at me
With confusion upon his face?

Louder Than Words

Silence speaks so loudly,
It's as if a cannon is going off
And I'm the only one who hears it,
But understands the pain
That same soundless shot produces,
And reminds me
That once again
Silence is a reminder
Of what once was
Can never be
Again.

Silence
Deafening silence.

WHY?

Sometimes things happen that you simply can't understand the reason why.

Sometimes it's hard to understand why things are allowed to happen that hurt so many.

Sometimes it's hard to remember that we aren't supposed to question why things happen like they do.

Right now, I'm having trouble with all of this, and I can simply just think of one word, over and over again, that word echoing over and over again in my mind...

WHY?

Snowflake's New Life

Souls are not limited to just people. I truly believe this.

I believe animals have souls too, because, to me, it makes sense that this is where their personalities come from.

I also believe those souls go to Heaven.

This being the case, I truly believe right now that our 17 year old cat Snowflake is running in Heaven right now and hearing for the very first time. I would also like to think she is enjoying that.

Her eyes are no longer running, the sore that grew on her right eye is gone and she's seeing better than she ever did before.

I also believe she's waiting on all of us to join her.

In a little while, Snowflake, we'll be joining you.

For now, enjoy your new home and all those things you are now blessed with.

We love and miss you, pretty kitty!

Snowflake

Like falling snow
Your world was quiet
Peaceful
And beautiful
You've brought that same
Peace and stillness
Into our lives
Giving us seventeen
Years of companionship
And love
And teaching us
That it's not the things
You hear
That give life its
Beauty
But the things that you don't hear.